Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Self re-assurance check




My forehead is abnormally big... my nose is too ethnic and my hair is way too course.I snore (at the the beginners satge). Im 100% African American and yet.... I have no butt. If I didn't shave I would be as hairy as big foot, I have an over bite the size of Mexico. And thats just my physical apect. I tend to lie at the wrong time and can be quite the manipulator. I over analyze the simplest things making everything more difficult than what it really is, I don't really know who I am yet, I have semi anger issues and can be too opinionated and blunt at times. But Im self-complacent with all of me!!! I love every part of my body inside and out! I don't want to evolve or change and I don't think I need to. Im so glad God made me a "hairy big-nose liar". Im La'Rhonda Yvette Swales =)

Thursday, September 3, 2009

I don't want no [thug!]

Someone recently asked me, "what was my type of guy". I quickly said, "I don't have a preference....I like everyone!" And then I paused and even more quickly took back that statement. It took me apporximatley 5secs to realize the falsehood of my statement. I lied 'unconsciously' without really thinking about my "type".

I have a boyfriend... his name is Bernard. But for this piece, pretend like he doesn't exist. So I don't really have a type (at least when it comes to race). But in every other sense, such as personality ect.) I do have a prefernece in guys! Because never in a million years would I consider to have relations or be in a relationship for that matter with a "thug". Though in my youth, I did have my share of "gangsters and thugs". But I don't think that I truly knew any better. I was too caught up in the pleasures of actually being wanted by a guy, that I totally ignored their lackadaisical lifesytles and disgusting habits! I seriously look back and resent myself for those descisions.. (though there is one who surprisingly taught me a lot about myself and life in general). Buy anywho, some of you guys are probably wondering what exactly is my definition of a "thug/hood guy"?. Its a pretty complex question that I can't fully explain in writing. But I will say this; A guy who drinks/smoke marijuana (on a daily basis), who has no job, no goals and or ambitions, no care for hygiene, dread wearing wann-a-be Lil Wayne gettin money (but in reality NOT gettin money), sleep around with any and every brand of girl with no cares or worries about life or the well being of others is my most simplistic definition of a "thug". I do not wish to give the time of day to any guy who posesses ANY of these qualities. I don't consider myself to be judgemental or buji. I just have standards. Forgive me but, I don't think those standards are too much to ask, and trying to change a thug is like a size 14 trying to fit into a size 4... its NOT gonna happen. So I choose to stay away from that type. they have nothing to offer me and vice versa. I don't have a type.... but please... no thugs :)

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